It’s a week since I’m back to my home country and hometown. Not much time to spend alone or online and very little time to write for the blog. The energy of the place is incredibly versatile. Like a rose with multiple petals, it reveals itself layer after layer. What I’ve uncovered about this land and its frequency so far is too overwhelming to grasp in one story. I know already that the impact of this trip will be deep and long-lasting. My past, present, and future are revealing themselves to me all at the same time. Remember that time is a circle.
What Pace Suits You?
I used to have lots of negative thoughts about all that I’ve experienced here in the past. Lots of traumatic experiences and memories that blinded me from seeing the truth about my birthplace. This place is mystical. It’s a microcosm of the macrocosm and an everything place. It keeps some people in stagnation and mental prison, repetitive negative cycles and unlearned lessons. New beginnings can be challenging. At the same time, changes can be abrupt and take you by surprise. Not everyone makes it through. Many are emotionally overwhelmed, others hold on to unreleased anger. Adjustments are slow and hard. The pace of life is rather unhasty and that can either make you or break you.
Volatile & Close To The Ground
It is far inland and mostly flat. I feel the grounding and connection to the earth. Its covered with snow half of the year recuperating from the fertile summer. It feeds the majority of the people still. You have to be mindful and avoid stagnation when the grounding gets too heavy. New spiritual ideas do not sink in easily due to that.
At the same time, the energy of the place is very unsettling. Remember the Sarmatian nomads? They took the best that this land offered and then moved on. It’s a cradle and a grave at the same time. In your mind, you never settle down once and for all while here. The dynamic of change can be accelerating. Always expect change. Impossible to maintain routines, but perfect to break the stagnant mind-patterns. Lucky those who manage to unveil the foundation – the fundamental mind-patterns and the core of the limiting belief systems. In this small pond, you can easily become a big fish if you so wish. At any moment, you can sink in the swampy comfort of the pond and never live up to your dreams. Yet it can spit you out just as easily.
Coming Full Circle
When I was moving out 10 years ago, I thought I’ve outgrown the pond. The whole world was at my feet, but my hopes and dreams were rather primitive. My perspective has changed tremendously, and I now enjoy the pulsation of the time (past, present, and future) all coming together once I’ve come full circle. I take great pleasure in the sense of integrity that this land allows me to experience. I don’t dread the idea of coming back home anymore. It feels right and I belong here. My programming matrix was created here and here it’s now being destroyed until it falls apart completely. What’s left of it will be carried by the wind into the steppe.